Rant #2

People say that you aren’t good for me
One even used the word “toxic” but how could that be true at all when I so easily fall victim to your tequila soaked lips and your nicotine stained charm?
Even now that distance has dragged us miles away from each other
I can’t help but walk out of my way through clouds of cigarette smoke because they remind me of you.
I can’t help but peek through the window of every silver car on the road that resembles yours
Because maybe the vehicle that took you away will bring you back and make me feel something again
They tell me I’m changing and they are absolutely right
But I don’t care.
I was never successful in drowning my demons in vodka but it seems like your kiss of salvation has done the trick instead
So excuse me while I get addicted to the rare feeling of happiness.
Maybe my mother is right and maybe I’m a symphony and you’re more of an old tune cranked out on an off-key piano but I don’t think that’s a fair analogy.
They don’t know me like you do.
They don’t know how I fell head-over-heels for the scent on your oversized sweatshirts and the way you looked down at your feet whenever you talked about your relationship with your father.
Maybe I’m overthinking it, but I find refuge in the fact that I’m not the only one here who’s broken.
I’m not trying to play Wonder Woman. I have no interest in saving you because I know that I can’t.
We’re both made of shattered pieces, but it’s looking like they kind of fit together somehow.
Who knows, maybe this thing we have will one day make itself into a beautiful picture,
Or maybe not.
Maybe we’ll just cut ourselves on each other’s rigid edges
But for right now I need you.


About savannahlyn

I write to articulate what my tongue cannot
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